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Saturday, April 25, 2015

小船的故事

上周一堆抱怨的文字,今天被删除
那些犯过的错 牢牢记住。
书本上的重点像一盘冷水迎面泼。
她说的话一次又一次的提醒爱做梦的小船。


没有同伴的小船,今天可算幸福,因为它拥有不会说话的陪伴
【斑尾,白龙,红武,红裙, 金麟和黄旗(新加入的小鱼们)】。
漂在同一片海域。

除了海风,小船无意听见别的声音。 
梦频道的话题,大约10分钟。嗯, 那是不切实际的声音。

我知道梦与现实的差别。
多羡慕勇敢去追梦的声音。
对于未来,还定不了位的人生可像漂流在大海的小船。
小船知道终究有一天可以靠岸。
小船也知道被海水侵蚀,狂风大浪的打击下很快会沉入深不见底的海低。
小船只有木筏...没有船陀...没有帆布
只有海风带领   或许海风也不晓得自己何去何从*咦,怎么这样?*

每天看见太阳升起降落
每天 重复漂流 ........ 偶尔看见海鱼与小船擦身而过总是无奈。

享受被*不孤独咖啡*伴着的船,明天不想被唠叨捆着。
或许漂到另外一片海域一切都会好转。但愿如此。

我不希望以后的时间都在抱怨现在的磨练。

听说5月前方会有灯塔出现!那是一盏转折点的登,灯塔里藏了知识?掩盖着幕后杀手的真相?还是一张把小船改造成大船的设计图? 


拭目以待...



Friday, October 10, 2014

late update bout' recent life


... I was admitted in hospital on 30 Sep 2014 , did an operation on 1 Oct 2014, officially diagnosed i got appendicitis and now I am recovering well. I was surprised that I am able to walk and squat few hours after operation. Feeling proud to myself!



in fact, i was quite happy the operation did in ipoh, so i can see my mum, rest in my sweet home, a perfect mum cooks the food i likes. it's really perfect reason / excuse for me to escape from the new environment. i try very hard to adapt all new stuff to me. i am still trying, so far i would say it's not the thing im looking for. 

time flies, scar recovered 95%, it's time back to the n/e again...challenging myself everyday, motivated myself every morning, funny thing is that my own motivational emotion  last for half an hour, when i reached office turn out being a jelly fish (lost direction). worse case is that, aft working hour feel more depress, all  caused by the horrible traffic jam ,terrible food, exhausted  life.
                                        
i think it's  quite true for applying pigeon-eyes theory in reality. i have sent 3 emails for requesting my completion letter to college, turn out no responde. so, who do you think you are to ask other give you a hand?!...no matter how, ii has to be done before i went back. 

more to be achieved. look at the to do list. you may say give up silently but do it conversely!!!


Cheer

Thursday, September 25, 2014

住院记 24-25/9/14


忘了从哪听回来的一句话有经历必有学习
这几天呆在医院最刻骨的记忆就是大家在享用早午晚餐时,我只能嗅到不同食物的香味,而空荡荡的肚子发出咕噜咕噜声的独奏。那刻,嗅觉也被训练到了另外一个境界,隔着厚厚的一层布我可以嗅到炒米粉里头有青菜的香味,猪肉粥诱人的香气,鱼汤那股温暖身体的滋味(没吃东西的人会经常发冷),冬菜蒸猪肉令人想扒饭的冲 ……

当人家用餐,乐得开怀时我却像一只小虾米缩在病床上被美味的食物惩罚着。臭觉刺激大脑幻想我最爱的食物, 它们都一一pass by and say hi!

顺带一提,今天是住院的第三天。 接下来我会提到在医院里学到的【原来】。

  1. 原来吊水的手被针孔插着会肿
  2. 原来吊水不吃东西是不会胃痛
  3. 原来吊水和禁食没有减肥作用,小肚腩还在==
  4. 原来长时间不动身体会僵硬掉! (仿佛体会到死人返生的滋味)

当然这些都是表面体会到的,接下来就要夸奖我的老爸。

他是一位很可爱的爸爸。他不懂得照顾病人,例如:乱带一些有的没的派不上场的东西给我。还很手贱的按我疼痛的部分,好像在测试你真的有酱痛吗?。。。 人不舒服自然脾气坏。是我不对,我承认!!!(举手)

 

我曾说:我很累,想休息。要他回家。他认为我在赶他走

我曾说:当然痛,按那么大力他认为我在骂他/发他脾气。

但,每次来探望我时,都会带着温暖的笑容,眯着他小小的眼睛*是自然的,他单眼皮*


临走前偶尔捏下我的脸蛋,偶尔闻我的头发,有时吻我的额头,有时我们还会拥抱。还真温暖。时空仿佛倒流到小时候每当爸爸从新加坡回江沙跟以前我还是小孩般的互动。感恩!

 

3天呆在这个鬼地方除了治疗,心里还添加一些些暖流。 这样的一场病战,我赢得漂亮!今天25/9,我出院了。

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

住院记 23/9


续出世1990年住院,这是第二次,故事当然不是把自己收缩回母亲的肚子里那么白痴。据医生检验,病情是与盲肠内部发炎有关。从病人的角度发言:哦,我的病情是在距离盲肠炎的边界,病状有如来月经, 虽然我没那样的经验,听身边的女生朋友的述说大概就是那样的感觉。这个病状在我当习生时经历过一次,看了医生,休息一天吃药就痊愈了。 这回可疼了三天还在痛,忍不住想说他妈的。

人既然有病就乖乖接受治疗,吊水,被针头插进手腕的脛没有想象的疼。场景倒回针头即将到肉时,眼看那位经验不足像是实习生的女护士把针头往自己的肉里来时,心情只有无奈。在针头即到肉时被另外一位看似有经验的护士救了一把,所以我才说吊水没有想     痛。 *松了一口气*

 

这一天23/9,禁食,禁饮,一天2次疫苗注射。可恶的是,现在肚子咕噜咕噜响却没能吃一粒米的资格。不满网速慢到不行,电话没电的惨遭及没有书本在身边的寂寞。虽然在医院除了休息及被观察病情是主因,但是没有了娱乐可会把人给逼疯。人活着要求真多。我可以体会到马克思脚伤在医院里闷到发霉的感觉。

 

关于最近的心情不多。首先,接了一份一脚踢的工作(19/9开工),完全没接触的领域。好听就是学新东西,难听就是自讨苦吃。话说,还蛮想念在实习的生活模式。在HS的人事物,无论好坏。现在的生活没有不好,只是不习惯。还没被老板训,因为还没亲自去干什么任务。与家人的沟通频密了。


今天到此,因为很饿==|||

 

Saturday, May 17, 2014

complains

walaoa...today topic is regarding what an intern should do ?

1. backup the ps shit work and do like a cheap labour.
**walaoa, you're holding the fucking checklist and u jst checked the list but nt the items and ask9 me to do the fuckin double job drive here and there collect the stupid walkie to you ?! what ? it's fine, you're just smart enuf, i can understand, jst tat im tooooo stupid.
   
2. fool by a ps and keep your mouth shut.
**awesome ! you can broke your promise after u turn ur head. ohya, the things is tat u din drink at all. and you tot i am drunk cat huh..??? i think this is the 1st time u made me pissed off ==


3. talk bad behind da ps, show ur fucking smile in front of da ps. (i think i failed to do this 1)
** Yes, it is like what i am doing now, write here, talk behind and how funny are you replied me tat pray hard? ##thumbs up##

anyway, was a lesson for me to see and learn. perhaps J is right, shouldnt put so much  effort for others people business. and  congratulation that you are in my black list  right now =)



goodbye and thanks for everything happened in my life.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

翻翻友人的札记,又看看现在的自己


札记? 是n年前人家所谓的日记, 现在已经没人写札记了, 用这词只是纯粹的任性把部落阁replace 罢了=p

其实现状真的不赖. 但,对于身边的人无论如何都过得比自己好的观念总是失衡...

做人其实可以很简单,但是不可以盲目. 换句话, 不可以盲目的过活,但可以简单的生活.
在现在这个应该睡觉的时间也不想把太多的时间花在为了写blog而拼命的挤point 长篇大论一通的写.

搁指.

Friday, January 10, 2014

最近の2013至2014

最近常把"忙"挂在嘴边,事实上是在拖延一天内需要干的活. 所以才会突然开窍想到"每天都告诉自己明天要加油,到现在才发现要告诉自己今天要加油才是王道"

最近觉得最感动的事情是得了一本找了很久的书籍-活该!
衷心感谢送书之人,没想到身边竟会有这么细心的人,虽然体型一点都不细,ops
回归正题,喜欢一本书的程度竟然超乎我的想象,细细的阅读每一句,深深感受欣怡(作者)的幽默. 还有舍不得那么快就读完这本书的心情,抱怨着为啥这本书一点都不厚?!...还很期待她的下一本作品呐~

最近常感叹为何小毛病一直缠身之事,例如嘴唇长期干裂和痒,已经快2个月了,皮肤的状况越来越糟糕, 也许到我油尽灯枯的那刻会变得很不好看,所以也是时候预先拍张车头照免得吓坏以后祭拜我的人们.话说我心底是这样想的... ....

**如果坟碑照片不好看, 拜祭品可能会很随便.

**如果坟碑照片不好看, 可能来拜祭我的小孩会在我坟前说:

为啥这个先人长酱啊? 幸亏我没像他. 
然后大人会说不可以那样没礼貌,先人会生气,
快烧多三根香赔罪!....

**我会翻个白眼, 也没很稀罕赔罪的香火...虽然他们都看不见... ... 我想.

最后心里还有些新一年的期望,也希望可以顺利的完成!毕竟没有目标的活着是很空虚的. 还有感恩<<夏目友人帐>>一部令人思考的动漫.启发不少,淡淡的剧情却包含了大大的激励.



谨记,要为每天加油!


Sunday, December 1, 2013

无奈

向往过着作家般的生活,可是灵感总不在身边
怀念以前对生活的抱怨,原来那是多么美好和值得怀念

有人常说活在当下,如面临死亡的情况,有多少人还可以坦然地活在当下?
活在当下是否只归于无忧无虑的乐天派还是讽刺不能够活在当下的人们啊?

崎岖的道路在前头,掉入悬崖是生命的尽头,最后一步,还是摆脱不了命运的恶魔之爪。
反正人生就是学习每个过程,逆来顺受,偶尔觉得累是正常的,我对自己说。

人生百态好无奈,或许明天又有谁不在.


Tuesday, November 26, 2013

HEBE TIEN 田馥甄 [你就不要想起我 You Better Not Think About Me] Official MV HD



听了第二篇,我确定我真的爱上了hebe 的第二主打!!!! 大家鼎力支持这首吧!!! 大爱大爱^^


曲:楊子樸、劉大江 詞:施人誠 編曲:洪敬堯、溫奕哲
製作人:呂禎晃、郭文宗 和聲編寫:郭文宗
吉他:王治平
Drums:陳柏州
製作助理:樊哲忠
和聲:田馥甄
你就不要想起我 

我都寂寞多久了還是沒好
感覺全世界都在竊竊嘲笑
我能有多驕傲 不堪一擊好不好
一碰到你我就被撂倒

吵醒沈睡冰山後從容脫逃
你總是有辦法輕易作到
一個遠遠的微笑 就掀起洶湧波濤
又聞到眼淚沸騰的味道

明明你也很愛我 沒理由愛不到結果
只要你敢不懦弱 憑什麼我們要錯過
夜長夢還多 你就不要想起我
到時候你就知道有多痛

當時那些快樂多難得美好
你真的有辦法捨得不要
才剛成真的美夢 轉眼就幻滅破掉
祝福你真的可以睡得好

明明你也最愛我 沒理由愛不到結果
只要你敢不懦弱 憑什麼我們要錯過
夜長夢很多 你就不要想起我
到時候最好別來要認錯
你就不要 想我到 瘋掉

明明你也還愛我 沒理由愛不到結果
只要你敢不懦弱 憑什麼我們要錯過
夜長夢會多 你就不要想起我
我等夜監聽你說多愛我


Sunday, October 27, 2013

自言自语-自私的耳目

新发现:

1. 最近写部落的次数还算蛮频密的...(爱上打字? >.<)
2. 蛮古怪的脾气

***来, 解释一下原因1, 可能是做fyp的关系加上常呆在家.有些心情不懂该往哪里抒发就往部落长篇大论一番.

(我也不懂是好事还是坏事)
虽然手头上还有东西要处理,但是写完后都不会觉得在浪费时间=p

***原因2,可能是压力所导致.
通常有压力的情况下,我想任何人的脾气都会比较暴躁吧~
现在fb酱的社交网络已经是我的home page了,所以非常讨厌看到那些每次重复重复都抱怨说为什么自己喜欢的人为什么不理(我) 啦, (我)很想你啦,怎么没回(我)信息啦, (你)有在想(我)吗??... ...之类之类的废话==


(ps:  我=发表状态的人; 你= 那个痴恋狂的对象)


而且几乎是每天都看到... 起初觉得还好吧...有了新对象,希望你找到幸福啦. 后来,我觉得这个人的思想和行为已经是一种病态了.每天都在怨天尤人....(你到底烦不烦啊?!)

对于每一次刷新我自己的面子书是都看到类似类似的状态,火都来==....(迟早有天把你unfriend掉),

对别人重复性的状态抱着酱子的情绪我也不晓得自己的反应是不是有问题.但是,我还是觉得那个人真的很有问题. >.<




不是每张  耳朵/眼睛  都喜欢  听/看  你的抱怨,. 

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

glad to be with u all

omg !!!!! ...the event that i'd/we'd  joined is on The Star online news.... just cant believe it and never thought that journalist has covered the event....i gt to know it from fb, click on the fxxking like and so exciting now!!!!!

Alright, this is the 3rd concert that i have joined since i am staying in pj for my degree. and i have learn alot regards to the dizi skills by "tou shi", it's the cheapest way to learn instrument...LOL

of course, there were a lot of fun and some emotional kind of thing had happened ; which i dont really wish to fresh back about it, but the auto-run process just bring me there, wtf was that being kind to a person, in the end  being point by the duuttttt words ==, s'more he's a teacher.

[personal think that those (part of) teachers that i've meet in pj/degree period is like always failed in respecting people ]

and sadly that the dai goh ( the man who call for lets ply some soundtrack together) have announced that he wouldn't continue for doing this sort of event d ='[

[due to the reason of some conflicts in the process of this event+health issue, if not mistaken]


UNLESS !!! we can give him  "可以让他继续傻下去的理由", is basically quote from wht he's said.
im just appreciate that everything he made for us and contributed (song writer, song composer, music scores distributor,  conductor, organizer, PR...etc  ....) in the event and you'v own my respect.

wishing that the "When Soundtrack Alive II" coming soon... ... ... ... plssss.....be crazier...i want to on stage with you guyss ...miss ya =']

btw, click on the link if u're interested on wads happening bout' the event  >>>>
http://www.thestar.com.my/News/Community/2013/10/21/Raising-funds-through-music-Money-to-help-old-folks-home-relocate.aspx


cheers~

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

let's ply clap and hide....and it's not "conjuring"

jst feel to write, write down all of my sight 
jst dont feel to read, seriously refuse to do it 
what i have is empty 
 cant even think on creativity...
jst  feel to talk loudly but there is nobody....

escape from reality.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Let Her Go - Passenger (Boyce Avenue feat. Hannah Trigwell)

my recent favorite song.
only know when you get in trouble and realize being as usual as ordinary thats called the beauty of peace.


cheers!

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Insidious 2

Well, i think this is the first post that i write a review for movie. honestly, i was freaking regret to sit for horror movie which totally not the usual sort of movie that i would go for. this time is jst distract myself to divert the negative emotion, so, the challenge accepted.

i have been sitting  approximately 145min for INSIDIOUS-Chapter 2. im not going to critic the storyline or wadsoever. what i going to comment is about the soundtrack, which is the soul for horror movie. if comparing from the last masterpiece -Conjuring by James Wan. the used of soundtrack involved a
 lot of base effects to create the fear but yet the thing doesnt came out == ...and self-scaring was wad i had felt.

the turn for Insidious, wad an unexpected soundtrack been chosen is high pitch sound of violin with some base which STRAIGHT FORWARD to SCARE you. YET! the THING didnt came out every time when the high pitch soundtrack came in.

the feeling is like watching classical kind of horror movie, if you're prefers this type of movie. Insidious definitely is your choice. let's go to cinema and ready to be SCARED.

A write for instability of emotion


 Trust could be lost, once you step in the complicated reality. 

whats make life keep going on ? its's people, wad makes so much of problems here and there? people !

...they drives you to heaven yet they pull you down to hell...what should i believe...keep stand on the safe side and watching the drama around ?
That is what i am doing from pass to then..

 perhaps this is good to have the first try, even though it is the endless gaming for life. 
instead of watching , let's try to participate the ride and see wad is happening on next.   

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

错与对



自己吃亏,不能怪谁
谁口无罪,满天是非

卸下防备,如此愚昧
到底为谁,如此狼狈
忽略防备,只好受罪

谨记这回,无言以对
没有谁对,自我心碎

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

李小蔗让我觉得很委屈

本人虽然向面书度发泄过了,也曾经尝试冷静下来思考过. 但,一想到李小蔗电邮的内容,情绪又不受控了. (不要拦着我,我要踢她下楼.    哦...哪实在太残忍了,她还有女儿需要她细心的栽培,....哪诅咒她女儿嫁不出好了)

做为师长的责任就是教导学生. 虽说大学程度的 学生要学习自立,要懂得自己解决鸡皮小葱的问题,但是=.=...由一个完全不是这个科系expert 的导师来领,书也教错,作业内容一知半解的你有啥资格跟我呛啥啊?!...况且你给的direction跟comment都不match ==

其母之! ... ... 在这说了一堆很负面的话,其实, 真!的! 有! 帮! 助!
也没什么好抱怨的(很官方的对blogger 说),生活就是弱肉强食,导师永远是对的,只要你的分数在他/她的手上,你没得反抗...我希望的是有一天可以还她一句"check dictionary if dont know the meaning ya" 你娘亲!==

我鄙视她白鸽眼的态度. 特别疼爱聪明的学生没有错,是自然反应,但也不可以把学习比较差的同学当白痴敷衍,你领的部分薪水还不是我给的钱.

最后还要很不甘愿的回她thank you. 其实超不爽==

被人酸了还要说谢谢,实在太委屈了吧.

当做学习, 好笑吗?!

最后,   学习看人脸色倒不如学习如何让人看你的脸色*haha, evil laugh*


Friday, September 20, 2013

第二首催泪曲:Yen-j嚴爵【沒有你怎麼辦】

听着听着,看着看着某某某在戏剧中演着他们的他们
朋友的故事在当下总是容易被感动
被感动不是因为同情 而是联想到哪一天的到来而感到不舍...没有你,怎么办... ...

想你们了 <3 div="">

Saturday, September 14, 2013

迷惘?

人生有几回真正活得像一个真正的自己
有多少次回首看着从前的回忆感到欣慰
有多少次觉得自己是实在的
有多少次觉得没白活

就在无助的时候看见特别特别不一样的影子
或许离看透还很远

搞不懂思绪的人还可以干什么
觉得累又算什么

路还是要走...

城市的霓虹灯藏着多少人的伤悲
夜晚的城市有多少人为了掩饰自己而在酒池拼命释放自己,搜索捕猎那里有小羊小兔傻乎乎的掉进陷阱满足猎人的欲望...那里有多少条视线交错以为那就是对的人?

我还是希望遇到一本对的书,咖啡的微香飘在房间的感觉.
即使自己一人也可以觉得很实在.

过后还可以对自己说,活着真好啊~


Thursday, September 12, 2013

陶喆×關詩敏 "好好說再見" 高畫質官方版MV(緯來戲劇台 花漾之戀浪漫滿屋2 片尾曲)


music can do  for the case when there is no words to express feeling... ....
listed this song as my favorite recently =p